Making a Difference
At Home Eileen devoted the first years of her marriage to a suburban lifestyle of endless hours of diapers, preparing three meals a day, scheduling doctors’ appointments and managing the family budget. It is hard to understand how she found the energy to manufacture these ballet recital outfits each year and sew holiday dresses for her girls. She took us to church on Sundays and read to us each night in a bedtime ritual that ended with prayers before she tucked us in.
As we approached our teenage years, Eileen was determined to find a way to help her children have access to the college education that she had been unable to experience herself because of her family’s financial setback. Without telling her husband or her children she secretly attended classes to update her “secretarial” skills and she reentered the job market. This turned out to be a happy development. She was surprised at how well she was received by the working world and she flourished in this new stage of life.
In the Community After her husband Walt’s death, Eileen started a solo journey on her own. She built a new life in Hendersonville never looking back. She joined the League of Women’s Voters, became VP of the local Unitarian Universalist Church, was active in the local Woman’s Club, and found volunteer opportunities to help her local community. She was recognized for some of this work by then Governor Martin for her outstanding service. She found a large circle of friends through bridge. She played in many small groups and transferred this skillset to her time in Independent Living making new friends at Carolina Village when she played 3-4 times a week.
Life is an Adventure It is hard for the Yuppie generation to grasp the change in daily life that people of Eileen’s generation have experienced. Technological breakthroughs provided many new choices for women taking care of a home. Improvements in medicine, including vaccines, helped ensure more children would survive childhood. The Social Security Act, World War II, and subsequent GI Bill, Equal Rights Amendment, Older Americans Act, Medicare and growth of corporate funded retirement plans all supported a more independent aging experience. As her children, we are blessed she lived in these times.
After the challenge of raising six children, then losing the dreams of retirement with Walt, Eileen went on to live her “Golden Years” solo in beautiful Hendersonville. The first thing she did was to sell Walt’s fifth wheel camper (his dream, not hers…) and make plans to travel the world with girlfriends. She went on numerous trips with local groups around the US. She also visited the United Kingdom, Hawaii, and New Zealand. She made time to host and visit all of her adult children and grandchildren.
True to her feisty nature, she waited until she was 90 to give up her lovely home, and move to Carolina Village. She had three of the happiest, unencumbered years of her life in her lovely Independent Living apartment sharing meals in the gracious dining room with various circles of friends. Her “Dance Card” was as full as she wanted with bridge, local outings and the social calendar provided to all residents.
She has received the finest of care the past three years in their Med Center (a Nursing Home setting.) She has survived the very sad times of COVID19, making it ever so more difficult for her to understand why everyone is masked, and no family visits. It has been heartbreaking for all of us to observe from a distance.
We are blessed and comforted to know she was truly loved by staff and she returned that love, much to our surprise and delight! She has probably lived longer than any of her children will, a testament to her perseverance and ability to overcome life’s obstacles as she saw fit.